“The people walking in darkness have seen a great light; on those living in the land of the shadow of death a light has dawned.” Isaiah 9:2

 Hi Becky and happy birthday!

Today within the halls of time and the hearts of those who love you, you turn 37 years old. With every year that passes I’m just a bit more envious of your new life. I miss you so much, but honestly, you dwell where I want to dwell. You see Jesus face-to-face; you KNOW the things I’m hoping for in faith. I’m so happy for you.

I come to your birthday this year so double-minded. There is SO much blessing. The kind of blessing that makes it baffling to think of going back in time and restoring your life to change today. It tears at my heart to say that, but the reality is strong.

The girls are doing well. Amity is ALMOST FIFTEEN. Over this year we’ve done some driver’s training stuff in the church parking lot. She is a careful driver, a good driver. I have no fear for the day she will be on her own, driving a car to and from all of her activities. By the way, that might be MY car she is driving. She loves the grandma-mobile and has made it clear that if we are ready to part with it when she is ready to buy, she is interested. She will find a formidable bargainer in her Grandpa, although his talk is much tougher than he is, especially when it comes to his grandchildren. Amity is in track and cross-country and she loves her band opportunities. One of her early Christmas presents this year was Amity and I going to the Majestic Theater to hear the Portland Cello Project. I can’t even explain to you what it meant to me to be sitting with someone so like-minded about music! Amity and I are kindred spirits when it comes to music and especially cello. My hope and prayer is that someday she will have the opportunity to try out this instrument that calls to us both!

Dara just turned THIRTEEN. She is coming into her own, sticking with her long-term interest in drama and singing. She is an extreme extrovert and realizing that about her has been an eye-opener for an introvert Grandma. She loves people, especially HER people, and she would gather us all to her permanently if she could. I so appreciate her drive to connect and wonder how God wants to use that for His purposes. Shhhh – she doesn’t know this yet, but in just a couple of weeks her early Christmas present will be a matinee with me to see “The Best Christmas Pageant Ever” at the Majestic Theater. I can SO see Dara starring in this show someday! It makes me smile to think of it and I know she will be thrilled with this time together. Next week on Monday or Tuesday Dara will audition for a role in the middle school presentation of “The Lion King.” She wants the role of Timon and I can SO see her in that role! I’m praying for her to present herself and her talents well and to have the discipline and flexibility that makes an actress easy to work with. I’m hoping her inner Timon is evident to those doing the casting! 🙂

Jacob seems happy. He seems at peace enough that his outlook has shifted to, well, an outlook! He is looking at life and considering options and once again aware of his ability to impact others. He has been teaching Sunday School and he allowed the Lord to use his gifts to speak at the Fall College Retreat this year. He shared his outline with me and it was such good, solid teaching. I don’t have opportunity to sit and talk with him one-on-one much anymore, but in a way even that is a good thing! He is busy, I am busy, we both are about the Lord’s business in our lives and I praise Him for that! I’m thankful for Cheryl and all that she has meant to Jacob and the girls. And I’m thankful for what they have meant in her life.

So, would I bring you back if I could? Yes. YES. YES! I miss you so much and I can’t help but think about what could be happening – even today! If at all possible, today we would have brisket and strawberry cake together and play cards and laugh and bless the day of your birth. Although maybe not because, you know, LIFE! Where would you be? What would you be doing? Your life had a different trajectory that could have had you anywhere doing anything in the world of Pharmaceutical medicine. My dreams are likely just little illusions that wouldn’t be in any case. And honestly, the world is a darker place today than it was such a short time ago when you left. You dwell in light. You dwell with THE LIGHT! It would be incredibly selfish of me to bring you back.

I love you and I can’t wait to see you again! Mom