Grief – Prayer Sustains

I don’t know what I would do without prayer.

I vividly remember that first phone call as we sat down to dinner at 5:14 p.m. on the night that Becky died. All we knew was that Becky had been in an accident, that Jacob was on his way to the hospital, and that he was pretty broken up. That was the extent of the message. I immediately lost my appetite and felt the knife edge of fear pierce my heart. But almost in the same breath I was engulfed in peace and calm. I found myself praying for Becky’s life and at the same time praying “Lord prepare us for whatever comes.” The rest of the evening was continual prayer for Becky, for Jacob, for Steve and my girls and my granddaughters, and whatever groaning the Spirit was praying on my behalf.

Within minutes of the first call we sent out a prayer chain request for prayers for Becky. Over the course of time people were praying all over the world. Even today, five weeks after Becky’s death people continue to lift us, Jake and the girls, and the rest of the family in prayer.

I’ve been amazed at the ongoing connection that I feel with the Lord throughout this. I haven’t felt forsaken or abandoned even when I’ve been at my lowest in grief. I’ve felt attached to Him, I’ve been aware of His comfort, I’ve sensed His willingness to listen to all my complaints and deep sorrow. Even when I’ve had some stubborn recalcitrant moments, I’ve sensed Him waiting patiently – wanting to comfort me. I wake up in the morning to worship songs pouring from my heart. I attribute this to prayer. It is as if prayer has been the umbilical cord keeping me attached to my Lord and God. I don’t think I’ve stopped praying at some level since the night of the accident and I know people have been praying for me at all hours of the day and night since then.

For this I am exceedingly grateful.

“In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express.” Romans 8:26-27

“Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” Philippians 4:6-7

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About Gleanings from Claudia

I am a wife, mother, grandmother,sister, and friend newly introduced to grief as I lost my 32 year old daughter in an auto accident in December 2010. I am a follower of Jesus and am journeying through grief while abiding in Christ.
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